recovery

hello world. i know it's been a long time since i've attempted to write anything in this forum. so it's with a lot of time on my hands and my friend tiffany's words swirling in my head ("i look at your blog every day checking for something new and all i see is 'south africa photos'!"), here's an attempt at reentering this world.

it's funny that this should be the time that i attempt to find something to say, as my life is not very full or busy at the moment. in fact, my days are rather simple, and primarily consist of sleeping in, making myself a cup of coffee when i finally do get up, and sitting around my apartment reading a lot and watching the occasional movie or season 1 of "friends" that was lent to me on dvd. i am home for an extended period of time recovering from an invasive surgery. yes, i am mostly housebound. and when you live in a basement apartment and it's brilliantly spring outside, cabin fever can run rampant. i know how quickly spring can make her appearance known and i get anxious with feeling like i am missing all of the cherry and plum blossoms and bright yellow daffodils, and my favorite, the magnolia trees.

but right now my job is healing. how strange is that? i've never been the best at "taking care of myself". i'd much rather tend to someone else's needs than my own, and i'm terrible at asking for help. and now here i find myself in a position where i've had to rely on other people to help care for me.

the response has actually been almost overwhelming...in a good way, of course. one of my dear friends organized for people to make and deliver dinners to me for two whole weeks! i've been so grateful to receive these meals and humbled by the generosity of the folks who have participated by giving their time and resources to furnish me with a tasty dinner and some very welcome company.

to be honest, it's taken some getting used to for this would-be hermit, having so many people step up and offer their services to me. it's been a good lesson for this girl, who has talked pretty openly on this blog about my struggles with loneliness and lack of connection in recent years. through this experience, i've had to allow my friends to be just that, my friends--i've had to open myself up to receive the gifts of their presence and their aforementioned generosity.

i know some of you who read this (if there's anyone left reading besides tiffany) are part of that number, and i just want to say a very sincere thank you. i have been blessed beyond measure to see how many people are available to me and willing to share their lives with me.